New Years Eve 2009

I have really been neglected this blog and just been posting on Twitter and Facebook. But I thought I would record some thoughts on this site, just to let it know I haven't forgotten all about it. Neglected, Yes. Forgotten, No.

I just want to sum up my thoughts on New Years Eve in one easy sentence.

Don't be an idiot.

That's it. Happy New Year!

Black Friday

So - it's Black Friday. The day of economic splurge and overindulgence. My plan is, and has been for years, to do not shopping at all today. I sleep in, wake up when I want to and get some coffee.
Then we contemplate decorating the trees - yes, trees - that we often put up the night before. Christmas begins for us, shortly after Thanksgiving dinner is complete.

I love the Christmas season, I really do, I just wish it didn't start BEFORE Halloween. But when I do get started on it, we go all out. 14 Christmas trees are put up in or around the house. We love to decorate and fully go crazy about the holiday. And keep in mind, I am an agnostic - but I love this season. I just don't buy into 'the reason for the season', I do believe in the 'doing good' and 'it is better to give than receive' concepts though.

So, I'm, going to throw some holiday music on and get to decorating a bit more...

does this make me a bad person?

I was gettig out of Jeep at the bank the other day and in the car next to me was an old Japanese gentleman holding his little lap dog and waiting for someone to come back out. He was wearing a ballcap that was embroidered with "WWII Veteran", and the first thing I though was

..."which side were you on?"

They say it's MY birthday

I recently turned the big 4-0, that's right 40.

And amazingly, I feel - nothing. It passed with barely a whimper. I made a few jokes about it, but there really was no impact to me about it. A few people have said they don't actually believe I am 40, which is nice.

I'm actually a little disappointed in 40 so far. I expected something, not sure what, but something. Maybe the key to some new bit of wisdom or a memebership to a hidden fraternity, but...there is nothing. It's just like 39. I wanted some kind of payoff - now I just feel let down about the whole thing.

Oh well, I guess I just go on being me at 40.

They say it's your birthday!

The day has come, my oldest daughter has turned 16 today. She was born on a beautiful spring day in 1993, at Queens Medical Center in Honolulu, HI. I cried while I cut the umbilical cord and she was taking her first breaths. The birth was both the most beautiful and most disgusting thing I had even seen. If you have even witnessed a birth, you know what I mean. She was easy to spot in the nursery that day - the only blonde girl in there, surrounded by the dark hair and skin of the rest of the children.

It seems that so much time has passed, but there is so much more to come. Proms, graduations, wedding, and maybe her own children.

I am so proud of the person she is and I hope she will continue to be.

I love her.

Update on the diet

I have hit the dreaded plateau at 256 - I just can't seem to get past it. I think I am going to drop to phase 1 again to see if I can shock the system back into loss mode.

Frustrating.

Whatchoo need?

Sometimes I think my doctor is a drug dealer.

Nah, I'm kidding. But, seriously, I ask him for certain drugs that I have researched that might help with my aggression and bipolar issues and he gives them to me. Usually for 30 days, then I go back, he asks if they helped and if they did he gives me 6 months worth of them.

The latest is Abilify which, so far, is helping me a lot. I am sleeping better, controlling my buildups and outbursts better, and making me more level all around. The bad part is that one of the side effects is weight gain. I guess that means I need to try harder on the diet/exercise front to keep losing and reach my goals.

Less of me

I haven't posted on the results of the eating habits in a bit, but I am still seeing success and am now down 20 pounds from when I started. I am now tipping the scales at 257, only 7 more to go to meet my goal weight.

Once I get there, I will be evaluating how I feel and whether I should attempt to drop even more. The ongoing goals will be to tone and firm what is left of me. The weight loss is great, but I'm not totally hung up on the number and am ultimately more concerned with how I feel and look. I have a fairly large frame so I can carry the weight, but I don't want to end up looking like the saggy baggy elephant.

I have been going through a daily regimen of situps, treadmill and universal weight machine to attempt to get myself in better shape, firm and tone and increase endurance.

I'll post agin when I hit 250.

I must be cranky today

A few things are bugging me today -

• People that pay cash - or worse - write checks for gas. Pay at the pump, people!
• People that pass me on the right when I'm turning left - or worse - when the mistakenly think I'm turning left
• People that have 18-20 items in the 15 or less aisle.
  
• People using self checkout lane for the first time ever, and have NO idea how "this new fangled thing works"

Grrr - I guess I was just impatient today.

Oh - I forgot...

• Alex Rodriguez has been using "performance enhancing drugs", which are apparently different from steroids. Bullshit spin doctoring. It's amazing to me that everyone else was using steroids, but the poster boy of baseball was using "performance enhancing drugs".

I decided to go on a "diet"

I guess you might call it a diet, or maybe just changing my eating habits, whatever it is seems to be working so far.

I know I said there would be no New Years resolutions for me, and that was kinda true. I latched on to resolution that my wife and daughter made, to lose some weight and increase activity to get in better shape.

It's pretty much the South Beach diet, limited grains, minimal sugar, lots of protein. I have also been increasing my activity and making sure I do at least 1.5 miles on the treadmill every night and getting some sit ups and weight training in as well. The "detox" stage kinda sucked, no sugar or grains for 2 weeks. But now that I am past that stage, it has gotten easier to maintain. I am still hesitant to eat the grains, and look for whole grains whenever I can. The sugar calls to me - the temptation is certainly there. I have been able to find some sugar free desserts that help me manage.

I started out at 277 pounds and after 1 month I am now weighing in at 263. So, 14 pounds is nothing to be upset about. Keep in mind I am 6'4'', so I'm not a small guy. I have had a few people mention that my face looks slimmer and my pants are a little looser in the waist. I would love to get to 250 ultimately, but I am using 5 pound increments as my intermediate goals. So, the next goal is 260.

The loss has slowed down, but I will keep working through and when I hit 260 - it will be posted.

Helio Gracie has passed away

Helio Gracie - the father of Brazilian jiu-jitsu has died at the age of 95. I wrote about him previously and listed my favorite of his quotes.

The impact of his fighting style cannot be accurately measured, but it might not be a stretch to say that modern MMA would not exist without this man.

An important figure in my life has died

I recently found out that my favorite high school teacher, and big influence in my life, has passed away at the age of 61 after a long struggle with cancer. I'm still reflecting on his passing and the over all influence he has had in my life. I hadn't talked to him in 20 years or so, but I though of him often. He taught my American History, World History and Current Events classes. I also worked as a student teacher for him during my senior year.

As I was able to travel around the world, and see a number of the places he had talked about, I always heard his voice in my head. That voice reminded me what that place was, it's history, and why the history was important to the world. It was great to finally see the places with my own eyes and take in all the senses involved with it. A number of the people I was traveling with had no idea what these places were and I kind of felt bad for them, that they had not been taught what these places were.

The textbook for our Current Events class was a subscription to Newsweek, which we examined each week and had assigned articles to read and often were able to choose an article of our own choosing. This class begin to show me how to look at what was going on in the world, and the way it was reported. As I reflect on this, I would have been nice to have both Newsweek and a publication from outside the US. In the years since, I have learned to appreciate the views of foreign publications - especially when reporting on US news.

In addition to being a great teacher and influence on my world views, he was a great hockey fan. I had attended many games with him and other students over the years, minor league games mostly. These games were much more affordable, and as he once told me, these players try harder. I liked it because there were more fights and you could actually get close to the action and meet the players afterward. I guess it's fitting that the old Sports Arena is being torn down and the next time there is minor league hockey in Toledo, it will be at a new arena.

So the life of my teacher, Arthur Marquardt, has come to an end, but he will live on with the influence he had had on me and others. My thoughts go out to his family and friends and everyone who misses him.

No resolutions for me...

I always find it interesting that at this time of year everyone seems to ask "What are your New Years resolutions?" The concept seems good, review your life and find the areas where you could make some improvements or changes. As if this is the only time of the year you can do that.

We all should be reviewing our lives and behavior constantly and making the adjustments as necessary to be better people, better friends, better spouses, better parents...just better.

Maybe I am making a resolution after all - to be a better person and make the changes that are required to have that happen.